Minnesotans! There’s plenty of room in my FREE workshop on Friday, May 2, 1-4 Central Time: The Echo That Remains. This workshop, held via Zoom, is for anyone who loved someone who died of suicide, substance abuse, or untreated mental or physical illness. Click here for more information and to register. Note that we do not share our writing with each other in this workshop, which you may find freeing. All are welcome, free of charge, no writing experience necessary.
Last week I stood on a beautiful bridge, watching the current flow beneath, when an idling motorboat dislodged a duck nest from the pilings. The nest went floating down the river, the mother duck frantic, fluttering up from her seven eggs and down again, helpless to stop the drift. Finally she jumped off and paddled to shore, her nest soon out of sight.
It hurt beyond all reason to witness that duck and her nest, because even though it was unintentional, too many other losses aren’t, like this heinous administration’s wanton, daily, abject cruelty. The world throws so much at all of us, animal and human; we should be careful of each other, and kind.
The Mower, by Philip Larkin
The mower stalled, twice; kneeling, I found
a hedgehog jammed up against the blades,
killed. It had been in the long grass.
I had seen it before, and even fed it, once.
Now I had mauled its unobtrusive world
unmendably. Burial was no help:
Next morning I got up and it did not.
The first day after a death, the new absence
is always the same; we should be careful
of each other, we should be kind
while there is still time.
Click here for more information about Philip Larkin.
alisonmcghee.com
My podcast: Words by Winter
Alison McGhee 
“It hurt beyond all reason to witness that duck and her nest, because even though it was unintentional, too many other losses aren’t…”
It’s not always the intent, is it? It’s the loss that hurts. And in the mother duck’s case, the helplessness.
We have a nest on our porch in a spot where the local juncos feel protected. Last year there were 4 rounds of eggs laid there, 3 or 4 each time and we got to watch the baby birds learn to feed themselves and then fly away. Fly is generous. They fell out and stumbled away as the parents chattered directions.
This year, four eggs appeared while we were away for an extended trip to Duke Medical Center, 5 hours away from home. Neighbors sent photos of the eggs but later reported that the nest had been cleaned out. I suspect crows who took advantage of us not being around.
Hopefully the juncos come back and try again this year. It’s terribly sad to see the empty nest.
But this story also has some amazing kindness. At the end of a nearly 5-hour drive and after 7 weeks away for my wife to receive a heart transplant, we came upon a cheer squad of more than 30 loving friends and neighbors in front of our house welcoming us back.
Those same neighbors who kept an eye on the nest, organized a loving group offering love and whatever help we need.
Yes, let’s be careful with each other and kind while there is still time. Thank you, Alison, for reminding me of how much I love Philip Larkin.
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It’s not always the intent, is it? It’s the loss that hurts. And in the mother duck’s case, the helplessness.
We have a nest on our porch in a spot where the local juncos feel protected. Last year there were 4 rounds of eggs laid there, 3 or 4 each time and we got to watch the baby birds learn to feed themselves and then fly away. Fly is generous. They fell out and stumbled away as the parents chattered directions.
This year, four eggs appeared while we were away for an extended trip to Duke Medical Center, 5 hours away from home. Neighbors sent photos of the eggs but later reported that the nest had been cleaned out. I suspect crows who took advantage of us not being around.
Hopefully the juncos come back and try again this year. It’s terribly sad to see the empty nest.
But this story also has some amazing kindness. At the end of a nearly 5-hour drive and after 7 weeks away for my wife to receive a heart transplant, we came upon a cheer squad of more than 30 loving friends and neighbors in front of our house welcoming us back.
Those same neighbors who kept an eye on the nest, organized a loving group offering love and whatever help we need.
Yes, let’s be careful with each other and kind while there is still time. Thank you, Alison, for reminding me of how much I love Philip Larkin.
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Robin, this is the most beautiful story. The ducks, the juncos, the helplessness and the love. And a post-transplant cheer squad. There’s so much goodness in the world despite it all. xo
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